Yesterday, 10:26 PM
"Beka, I wish I had an explanation for you, but I don't, and to answer your question, no, I've never thought of it like that. We don't see each other as much as I'd like to begin with, but we knew that because of what we do. I do get to be me with you. You've shown me that I can be after everything I went through before. I'm not about to find someone else and I can't believe you suggested that."
“Maybe you should.”
The words were out before even the redhead realised she’d said them, but she looked up at Aeryn anyway.
“That came out wrong, but… Actually, no. I don’t think it did.”
I didn’t mean to say it, but I think I mean it?
“I just can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right here,” Beka said. “I don’t think this is working. I don’t think that we’re working.”
She sighed.
“I couldn’t be more of a stereotypical fiery redhead sometimes. But I’m like that because I feel passionately about things. I just don’t get that vibe from you at all. Even when I’m blatantly being a total c**t like I am tonight, you’re just so… So passive about it. Yell at me. Scream at me. Show me I’m worth getting pissed at. But that’s not who you are, is it?”
She leant forward, resting her head in her hands for a moment before straightening up again.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so blunt about it. You deserved better than that. But I’ve been thinking it for a while. And maybe it just took being this dead on my feet to make me finally say it.”
Sydesh looked up. There was no putting genie back in the bottle now, and there was regret clear as day in her green eyes. But she wasn’t sure she that, even if she could, she’d take any of it back.
“Maybe you should.”
The words were out before even the redhead realised she’d said them, but she looked up at Aeryn anyway.
“That came out wrong, but… Actually, no. I don’t think it did.”
I didn’t mean to say it, but I think I mean it?
“I just can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right here,” Beka said. “I don’t think this is working. I don’t think that we’re working.”
She sighed.
“I couldn’t be more of a stereotypical fiery redhead sometimes. But I’m like that because I feel passionately about things. I just don’t get that vibe from you at all. Even when I’m blatantly being a total c**t like I am tonight, you’re just so… So passive about it. Yell at me. Scream at me. Show me I’m worth getting pissed at. But that’s not who you are, is it?”
She leant forward, resting her head in her hands for a moment before straightening up again.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so blunt about it. You deserved better than that. But I’ve been thinking it for a while. And maybe it just took being this dead on my feet to make me finally say it.”
Sydesh looked up. There was no putting genie back in the bottle now, and there was regret clear as day in her green eyes. But she wasn’t sure she that, even if she could, she’d take any of it back.