06-15-2026, 08:52 PM
Personal Log
Beno Velaul.
I am still working out the details of everything that happened since we were on the surface to now, I did admire his passion and how he stood up for what he really believed. Even if I couldn't say it in words back then, it was just a matter of location. There were a few other things I wanted to say as well, however the time and location prevented me from doing the same thing. There is something I did come to realize, something important.
As an Officer we try hard to provide a good example for the crew under us, sometimes even above. I work hard to validate every member of the crew, help them advance while helping them develop the skills to go along with it. Now where the confusion that comes in, I only meant to open up part of my personal life to him to test the waters. The reality of what happened took me by complete surprise, my internal mother instincts woke up with Reyna. There are a lot of details there surrounding this, the most important is the fact she went strait to the heart. The details surrounding her birth are not important to me at all, just that she is a loving child that is too smart for her own good at this time.
I have been attempting to teach her the value of being a young women, enjoy things while you can before the responsibility of being an adult. Before every choice that we make carries with it consequences, if I can get her to talk like a regular child it could help her in the long run. The lesson I am trying to teach her at the same time as just enjoy being young, its ok to be smarter than the people around you but not when you make people feel daft around you. It is the difference between talking to people, and talking at them. If I can get her to learn this when she is young she can go far in life, if she follows her fathers footsteps or makes her own path she will succeed in ways that neither of us can achieve. That is always the goal of every parent to make sure their child, to do better in life than they could ever.
I wandered off topic. The door to my personal life was blown completely open, I experienced a lot of pleasures that I have missed for years in ways that I can and not talk about with people. When it comes time to put the uniform back on I will be lighter in the step, I am certain Daniel will notice a big difference with me when I see him on the Bridge. One person wouldn't even have to look, ch'Alev would just know because of his gifts.
When the new mission starts, I will be able to go into it without the weight of the last. As Alex describes it the dance through a mine field, how I made it to the other side I have no clue. I just know as a result I was mentally exhausted, I probably wouldn't be able to solve a Childs riddle. Now I am excited for the future, what are we going to do now? Where are we going to go? For what reason? All that we can discover as we go along, with one last lesson that I hope future officers or upcoming ones through the ranks. The life of a Captain really is a lonely one, but that has nothing to do with their personal life. There are choices I am going to have to make the day I become a Commanding Officer, those are going to weigh heavily on me because I have to do it alone. Having that outlet to really let go with someone I love can make the difference, if there is no release it will lead to the laughing academy. Knowing me I would orginize a poker party as soon as I find someone with a full deck.
End log
Beno Velaul.
I am still working out the details of everything that happened since we were on the surface to now, I did admire his passion and how he stood up for what he really believed. Even if I couldn't say it in words back then, it was just a matter of location. There were a few other things I wanted to say as well, however the time and location prevented me from doing the same thing. There is something I did come to realize, something important.
As an Officer we try hard to provide a good example for the crew under us, sometimes even above. I work hard to validate every member of the crew, help them advance while helping them develop the skills to go along with it. Now where the confusion that comes in, I only meant to open up part of my personal life to him to test the waters. The reality of what happened took me by complete surprise, my internal mother instincts woke up with Reyna. There are a lot of details there surrounding this, the most important is the fact she went strait to the heart. The details surrounding her birth are not important to me at all, just that she is a loving child that is too smart for her own good at this time.
I have been attempting to teach her the value of being a young women, enjoy things while you can before the responsibility of being an adult. Before every choice that we make carries with it consequences, if I can get her to talk like a regular child it could help her in the long run. The lesson I am trying to teach her at the same time as just enjoy being young, its ok to be smarter than the people around you but not when you make people feel daft around you. It is the difference between talking to people, and talking at them. If I can get her to learn this when she is young she can go far in life, if she follows her fathers footsteps or makes her own path she will succeed in ways that neither of us can achieve. That is always the goal of every parent to make sure their child, to do better in life than they could ever.
I wandered off topic. The door to my personal life was blown completely open, I experienced a lot of pleasures that I have missed for years in ways that I can and not talk about with people. When it comes time to put the uniform back on I will be lighter in the step, I am certain Daniel will notice a big difference with me when I see him on the Bridge. One person wouldn't even have to look, ch'Alev would just know because of his gifts.
When the new mission starts, I will be able to go into it without the weight of the last. As Alex describes it the dance through a mine field, how I made it to the other side I have no clue. I just know as a result I was mentally exhausted, I probably wouldn't be able to solve a Childs riddle. Now I am excited for the future, what are we going to do now? Where are we going to go? For what reason? All that we can discover as we go along, with one last lesson that I hope future officers or upcoming ones through the ranks. The life of a Captain really is a lonely one, but that has nothing to do with their personal life. There are choices I am going to have to make the day I become a Commanding Officer, those are going to weigh heavily on me because I have to do it alone. Having that outlet to really let go with someone I love can make the difference, if there is no release it will lead to the laughing academy. Knowing me I would orginize a poker party as soon as I find someone with a full deck.
End log