05-30-2024, 10:52 PM
== Coffee Timeline ==
Mara’s lips pulled back in a feral smile as Tyra coolly stated she wasn’t that far removed from biting back in the briefing.
I’m glad she didn’t. ‘Cause that wouldn’t have ended well at all. I was going for it at the time, not sure I’d have had the presence of mind to reign it in.
The drinks arrived shortly afterwards along with a plate of huli for each of them. Calleja unashamedly wolfed down her savoury pie to temporarily sate her Amazonian physique’s constant demand for calories, before leaning back with the coffee mug cradled in her hands.
She already knew how dedicated Artemis was to improving its officers, but it was still reassuring to hear it again and that the principle still applied even after her transgression. Mara believed herself to be a work in progress. There were things she did exceptionally well and others that she was still learning. Before joining the crew she had been a line officer with no inclination towards leadership but since her transfer, she felt like she had taken some big steps forward.
One or two backward, sure. I’m still a mouthy bitch at the best of times. But mostly forward.
"You weren't necessarily wrong though. I would have and have had those concerns when I wore your uniform and I can respect your willingness to voice it. Just next time, like we talked about, pull me aside to do it," Tyra said before taking a sip of coffee.
“Yeah, message received,” Mara replied with a grin. “By all rights I should have spent the rest of that mission on the bench with tinnitus. Not gonna happen again.”
"Of course, none of us knew then what a colossal mess this would all become. I might need to get my crystal ball worked on before the next outing," the Captain joked dryly, the humor not quite reaching her eyes. "How are you holding up since we've been back? Did Mayfair get you all stitched up?"
“I mean, you seemed to know how it was gonna go at the briefin’, even if you didn’t actually say it. And even though you didn’t know how many extra layers of shit Command was gonna add on top,” Calleja said, before taking a sip of her own coffee to marshal her thoughts.
“As for me, physically I’m fine,” the Bandaran said. “I went down once we got back from Callisto. Sydesh patched me up good as new. I’ve learned over the years. You take the hits, you go straight to Sickbay and get it over with once things have died down. Sure, when the heat is on, you keep goin’ until the mission is done. Whatever it takes. But after, don’t be stupid. I’ve got no patience for anyone tryin’ to soldier on when there’s an entire department down there to keep us goin’.”
She paused for a moment, her brow furrowing.
“Mentally, emotionally… Not so great,” she admitted. “We put everythin’ on the line and came out with nothin’ to show for it. And it’s not like I can point to anythin’ we did and say ‘that’s where it went wrong, that right there is what we could have done different’. ‘Cause I honestly don’t think there was a moment like that. Our primary, secondary and hell, even the tertiary objectives were all long gone before we got there, and then we got hung out to dry and had to limp home in a bucket even the enemy didn’t want.”
Mara was being careful about what she said given where they were having the conversation, but her meaning was still pretty clear to Tyra. The Artemis team had boarded Callisto after the slipstream drive, the prisoners and the senior Cardassians had already gone.
“I’m tryin’ to find healthy ways to vent,” she said. “Deliberately avoidin’ pickin’ up a phaser or goin’ full send on a trainin’ sim until I’m calmer. I’ve lifted a lot of plates these last few days. Been talkin’ a lot with my vocal coach too, she’s teachin’ me a new style to give me somethin’ to focus on. Just… Yeah. I keep goin’ back to what happened and I’m strugglin’ to move on and let it go.”
The raw frustration hung from her words, the emotion all too visible in her dark eyes as she leaned forward and her voice softened.
“Nothin’ we did would have made a difference. I got my connections, I know what happened with Elias. I saw the report on D’Mar. We’re gonna be facin’ the consequences for some time yet, and for what?” She sighed. “And yeah, I said ‘we’. If you need anythin’ from me, if there’s anythin’ I can do, just say the word. These shoulders don’t slope.”
She took another sip from her coffee, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly.
“I know you probably can’t say much about all the behind the scenes shit, but are you OK?” Calleja asked. “I can’t even imagine how all this feels like from your perspective, with an actual kid to go along with all the older ones on your crew.”
There was a ghost of a smile on her lips as she cracked the joke and leant back.
== To you! ==
Mara’s lips pulled back in a feral smile as Tyra coolly stated she wasn’t that far removed from biting back in the briefing.
I’m glad she didn’t. ‘Cause that wouldn’t have ended well at all. I was going for it at the time, not sure I’d have had the presence of mind to reign it in.
The drinks arrived shortly afterwards along with a plate of huli for each of them. Calleja unashamedly wolfed down her savoury pie to temporarily sate her Amazonian physique’s constant demand for calories, before leaning back with the coffee mug cradled in her hands.
She already knew how dedicated Artemis was to improving its officers, but it was still reassuring to hear it again and that the principle still applied even after her transgression. Mara believed herself to be a work in progress. There were things she did exceptionally well and others that she was still learning. Before joining the crew she had been a line officer with no inclination towards leadership but since her transfer, she felt like she had taken some big steps forward.
One or two backward, sure. I’m still a mouthy bitch at the best of times. But mostly forward.
"You weren't necessarily wrong though. I would have and have had those concerns when I wore your uniform and I can respect your willingness to voice it. Just next time, like we talked about, pull me aside to do it," Tyra said before taking a sip of coffee.
“Yeah, message received,” Mara replied with a grin. “By all rights I should have spent the rest of that mission on the bench with tinnitus. Not gonna happen again.”
"Of course, none of us knew then what a colossal mess this would all become. I might need to get my crystal ball worked on before the next outing," the Captain joked dryly, the humor not quite reaching her eyes. "How are you holding up since we've been back? Did Mayfair get you all stitched up?"
“I mean, you seemed to know how it was gonna go at the briefin’, even if you didn’t actually say it. And even though you didn’t know how many extra layers of shit Command was gonna add on top,” Calleja said, before taking a sip of her own coffee to marshal her thoughts.
“As for me, physically I’m fine,” the Bandaran said. “I went down once we got back from Callisto. Sydesh patched me up good as new. I’ve learned over the years. You take the hits, you go straight to Sickbay and get it over with once things have died down. Sure, when the heat is on, you keep goin’ until the mission is done. Whatever it takes. But after, don’t be stupid. I’ve got no patience for anyone tryin’ to soldier on when there’s an entire department down there to keep us goin’.”
She paused for a moment, her brow furrowing.
“Mentally, emotionally… Not so great,” she admitted. “We put everythin’ on the line and came out with nothin’ to show for it. And it’s not like I can point to anythin’ we did and say ‘that’s where it went wrong, that right there is what we could have done different’. ‘Cause I honestly don’t think there was a moment like that. Our primary, secondary and hell, even the tertiary objectives were all long gone before we got there, and then we got hung out to dry and had to limp home in a bucket even the enemy didn’t want.”
Mara was being careful about what she said given where they were having the conversation, but her meaning was still pretty clear to Tyra. The Artemis team had boarded Callisto after the slipstream drive, the prisoners and the senior Cardassians had already gone.
“I’m tryin’ to find healthy ways to vent,” she said. “Deliberately avoidin’ pickin’ up a phaser or goin’ full send on a trainin’ sim until I’m calmer. I’ve lifted a lot of plates these last few days. Been talkin’ a lot with my vocal coach too, she’s teachin’ me a new style to give me somethin’ to focus on. Just… Yeah. I keep goin’ back to what happened and I’m strugglin’ to move on and let it go.”
The raw frustration hung from her words, the emotion all too visible in her dark eyes as she leaned forward and her voice softened.
“Nothin’ we did would have made a difference. I got my connections, I know what happened with Elias. I saw the report on D’Mar. We’re gonna be facin’ the consequences for some time yet, and for what?” She sighed. “And yeah, I said ‘we’. If you need anythin’ from me, if there’s anythin’ I can do, just say the word. These shoulders don’t slope.”
She took another sip from her coffee, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly.
“I know you probably can’t say much about all the behind the scenes shit, but are you OK?” Calleja asked. “I can’t even imagine how all this feels like from your perspective, with an actual kid to go along with all the older ones on your crew.”
There was a ghost of a smile on her lips as she cracked the joke and leant back.
== To you! ==